Grandma Ruth

My maternal grandmother Ruth is someone special. Sadly, I didn't get the chance to grow up around her. Didn't even get to meet her till my early twenties. And when I did meet her, along with my great grandmother Stone, I realized that I came from a long line of strong, smart, adventerous, independent, and fiery women. And those are qualities that I have a great respect and admiration for. I see those qualites in my girls, and while they frustrate the heck out of me at times, I am mostly proud, and relieved, because I know that means my girls have a backbone, that they have what they need inwardly to meet life's adversities as well as having the curiousity to explore some of the wonderful things living on this planet has to offer them.

My grandmother was recently in California for my cousin's high school graduation, which meant we got to visit with her again. It was the second time in about six months she made the cross country journey. This time she flew but last fall, my young at heart grandmother, drove,  yes drove, the 2,570 miles from her home in Cordele, Georgia to her youngest son's house in Sacramento, California. My Uncle Wayne accompanied her but still, 2,570 miles for an 86 year woman. That's amazing! And it wasn't her first time. A couple of years back she also drove to visit her son and us grandkids. Remarkable. That is the word that comes to mind when I think of my grandmother. She truly is remarkable.

And this adventerous, free-spirited way was not limited to my grandmother. Her mother was a pretty strong, idendepent woman herself. During the course of discovering my family history, I learned that my Great Grandma Stone, was in an unhappy, unhealthy marriage. In those days, a woman married with children did not walk away from a marriage. That could have been considered scandalous, especially in the south. But Grandma Stone knew that staying in a sitatuion that was not the best for her kids was more important than the social norms of those days.  She left her marriage and eventually remarried to a man whom she had more children with and lived with until he passed away. I have the upmost respect for her decision. What a brave woman. It's an honor to be related to a woman who thought and lived outside the box. Grandma Stone, she lived until 96.

This a photo of poor quality but it's one of the only one
I have with Grandma Stone (1992).

Grandma Ruth had to make some of her own hard decisions. Her first husband, my grandfather, turned out not to be good husband or father material. He choose to leave his family in Miami and return to Indiana where he was originally from. My grandmother eventually made her way to Key West to work and raise her kids. In those days, Key West, was a very tight knit island community where the children could run around and play in the warm sun, all day, without worry.

My grandmother remarried to a Key West fireman, Charles Torress. They had two sons together. In Key West, the community was largely Cuban, so my three Uncles were raised with their Cuban-American father and his family along with my grandmother and grandma Stone, who also lived in the Keys. Life was moving along when tragedy struck; Charles was killed while on duty. Grandma was left a widow with four young children. But as hard as that was, my grandmother didn't let that stop her from taking care of her family. She worked two jobs and managed to make ends meet. My birth mother, Susan, who was the oldest of the four, was old enough to help out when my grandmother had to work. Key West was small enough that other families and friends also looked out for my grandmother and her family.

Eventually grandma remaried a navy man, John 'Ski' Ciesmieroski. They were transferred from idealic Key West to San Diego. Thankfully, life got a little easier for my grandmother and she remained married to Grandpa Ski for close to fifty years. Sadly, he passed away a couple of years ago. I am not sure how my grandmother has coped with so much loss; she lost a daughter and a husband in the early part of her life and the death of her mother, son and grandpa Ski in later years. But that's part of what makes my grandmother so extrordinary; she is so tough and she remains positive and upbeat, even in the darker moments of human life. Her strength and ability to carry on is not only an example to follow but I see where I get some of my own tenacity. I see this in my sister Kim too. It appears that this side of the family has some strong (some might call it stubborn) traits but I am most thankful for that.

My grandmother is quick to put me in check when I complain or say something not so nice about someone and that has helped me to be a better person. She says what she needs to, is direct as an arrow moving toward it's target and don't dare to think anyone can get over on her. I made that mistake recently and she flat out told me, "I don't do anything I don't want to do. Never have and I never will." I love her spirited nature!

I am ashamed to say I have not made it to my grandmother's home in Georiga yet (we usually visit here in California or in Florida) but I have committed to visiting her home in Cordele before 2012 is out. I am going to take my girls to see their Georgian roots so that they can strengthen their connections and build some more memories to this amazing woman! And I am grateful that as my girls grow into women and make their way in this wonderful but sometimes challening world, that they have a long line of courage and strength to tap into as well as their own inner pool of  power and resourcefulness.

Grandpa Ski & Grandma Ruth

2002

(L-R) Oscarina Fernandez, my nephew Alex, sister Kim,
great grandmother Stone, granda Ruth, Onnie Fernandex
(Onnie and Oscarina are my sister's grandparents from
her father's side), 1992

My birth mother, Susan Blizzard.
Susan passed away too early (around age 25)
but she too was a strong, independent woman.

Alhambra Valley Farm

This has been a long week, with Don gone to L.A. for work. The days start early (5 a.m. on workdays & 6 a.m. on home days). Fortunately, long before Don's unexpected trip, I had arranged a field trip with Amara's preschool, Little World Montessori, to our local farm just down the road. Our field trip meant a fun break in the middle of the week as it was something to look forward to and something to distract the girls from them missing their papa.

I have written about Alhambra Valley Farm in a previous blog post, describing how much our family loves visiting the domestic and more exotic animals that reside there.  We eagerly anticipate their summer farm stand where we can purchase their fruits and vegetables. Their olive oil, which they grow and press, has long been used in our kitchen. That we are fans our this little local farm is obvious. So it was especially exciting to take the little people from Amara's preschool to visit and get to see it up close and personal and where we got to learn about the farm's history and see some of the behind the scenes, daily workings of the farm.

Tom Powers bought the land about twelve years ago. He is growing vegetables including artichoke, tomatoes, swiss chard, peppers, olives, tomatoes and much more. He told us he recently got a sweet puppy, Diego, to help with the coyotes (we were sad to learn that two sheep were dinner to coyotes the night prior.)

Big Mama Lama (that really is her name!)

As a life long animal lover, I was pleased to learn that all of the animals on the farm were rescues. That Tom has taken them in is a reflection of his kindness. We got to meet Big Mama Lama and her two 'babies'; Baby Boy and Baby Girl, a bunch of sheep and a goat and of course, the emu. The children were giddy to see them so close! And a little frightened too!

Big Mama giving kisses to Tom. That's trust!

Daddy Lama and the One Lone Goat!

Some of the sheep.

Big Mama Lama was gracious enough to give me a smooch too!

                       

Tom telling us about the crops he is growing.

This is the farms water source.

Somehow shells ended up on the farm. Here is Amara with
her treasures.

Some of the Little World Montessori Crew.

Part of the olive oil pressing/holding process.

Swiss chard.

Peppers.

Any good farm has a healthy compost pile!

One of the many owl houses. They usually house here in winter
and help with the gopher problems.

Havana was over the moon to be on a field trip with
the bigger little people.

Young olive trees.

Feedig the emu corn.

The little ones all seemed to enjoy their visit to Alhambra Valley Farm. As a parent, I think it's crucial that our young ones know where food comes from. Some of the other parents also have gardens, as do we. But our own little garden can only produce a miniscual amount compared to this modest farm. Which is why I wanted my girls, and the children at her school, to get an understanding of where our food comes from and what growing food entails.  It is never too soon to teach our little ones this important life lesson.

But it was clear, that the animals were the highlight of this field trip. It was a little scary but exciting to get up close to the big lamas and emu. Some kids got close and some stayed behind! And for this big kid, I was overjoyed to get a kiss from a lama. That made my day, made my soul child smile and helped the week go alittle smoother. And the next time we pass by the farm, we will have a better appreciation and stronger connection with the animals and land. How wonderful!

Stick Beach

My friend Valerie recently invited our family to join hers for a picnic supper at Stick Beach in Hercules. It was a warm, sunny, Saturday evening, without the usual windy Bay Area fog to make such outings cold and miserable. So we loaded up the car and headed down to this beach along the San Pablo Bay.  Stick Beach isn't really a beach by normal beach standards. There is some sand and gravel and when the tide is out there's a whole lotta mud. Which is like winning the jackpot for toddlers! The other woo-hoo thing was that beach runs right along the train tracks which made for lots of up close looks at the passing trains. I always find it sweet how little kids just love big moving objects! And big kids too! I have a fascination with freight trains so I was as tickled as the girls to see the many fleeting trains.

 

Amara looked like a little diva waiting to be served her dinner!

Havana wasn't loving the beach so much.
She eventually talked Don into taking the playground nearby.

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Amara and Eli couldn't get enough of the water and mud.

And of course, each passing train got a personal hello.

Downward facing dog, mud style.

The only thing about the beach that I didn't like, and which I actually was left with a deep sadness, was how much trash was along the coastline and in the water. There was alot of (broken) glass, plastic bottles and other garbage that had clearly floated in. It breaks my heart that we humans are so mindless and disconnected about where we put our trash (or where we don't-garbage cans) and how we continue to produce things that are not bio-degradable. So as we drove home I talked a bit with the girls about the importance of honoring the earth, enjoying her wonderful playground and putting trash where it belongs.
And when we got home, the girls got hosed off before they got scrubbed down in the tub! The fact that they were so dirty was a telltale sign of how much fun they had had!

Havana having fun before she got bored and longed for the playground.