Havana goes to Sleep-Away Camp

                             

For the past several summers (with a break due to Covid-19), Don, Havana and I have sent Amara off to sleep-away camp.  Since they were little, I touted the summer highs of sleep way camp, sharing stories from my experiences and I could not wait until the girls would get on that bus. However, the first time went Amara was bittersweet. I cried at her leaving but also rejoiced because I knew she was lucky to be heading towards a summer adventure that she'd never forget. My doubting spouse questioned how I knew she'd have a good time. I just knew. I knew my girl and I knew how fun camp could be for young people. The independence from parents, making new friends, being in nature, trying new activities, all contribute to counting the days until next summer. 

I wanted Havana to have that same experience. She was a bit too young that first summer Amara went. But with subsequent summers, when she was old enough, she declined. Forcefully. She was not interested. She did not want to be away from home. She just was not ready. And yet, for the past few years, I have still asked each camp registration season, "Havana, do you want to go to sleep away camp?"

This year, as Havana approached thirteen I got a 'maybe'. I could take a maybe. I also know my Baby Girl. She is more introverted, initially shy and needs support. At her new school, she has become close with a girl named Morgan. Morgan and Havana have a lot in common but where Havana is reserved, Morgan has confidence and an inner strength that she can express (Havana reserves that until she knows you!). I thought if Havana could get her pal to join her, it would make going to camp not only more enticing but more enjoyable. Havana having a safe and trusting friend would help her navigate any rough spots.

I reached out to Morgan's mom who was all in. Morgan has been going to sleep away camp since she was much younger so the hesitation that Havana felt was no present. We signed them up and I held my breath. I knew there was a chance Havana could back out. But as we got closer and as her sister helped her get ready with both encouragement and mood, Havana seemed more relaxed about her decision. Still, I could see some nerves.

Then, at long last, it was departure day. We almost missed the bus because I did not know there were two YMCA's in Richmond (and went to the wrong one) but we made it with enough time to take some deep breathes, snap some photos and chit chat with Morgan and her mom. And we found out that one of the counselors was from Jamaica. It all was lining up perfectly!!!

When Havana got ready to get on the bus, I felt the tears form. I knew what a big moment this was for her.  My anxiety about her feeling safe, not getting overstimulated, having enough food she would eat, being warm enough, all those thoughts flooded my head. Then I took another deep breath and I let it all go. I 'saw' Havana having that camp experience I always wished for her.  I am hopeful that she comes home with a big smile, lots of stories and memories that will live in her heart.

(I wrote this and then during the following days saw some photos on-line of Havana at camp. She looks happy and the fact that we have not gotten a phone call is good news. I hope she is having a great time!)